I'm trying so hard not to go to sleep. If I take a nap on a call day then it's even more difficult to fall asleep at night. The house is very quiet and all of the animals (even AGW) are resting. I can't rest though or it will be a long night.

This morning I met with two other surgery spouses. I was so excited to finally meet some other women who are going through the same trials and tribulations as me. We had a playdate at a park that I had wanted to visit, so that worked out well too. The park is in another suburb that is just a little bit closer to the hospital. It's were many residents and their families live, and we would have loved to join that area, but it's quite a bit more pricey. The houses are all so charming and old, I loved driving through and taking it all in. But, I adore our little street and our very own house just the same.

So in meeting these ladies, I was hoping to gain some positive insight into my future. I was hoping that being a surgery resident's spouse is really not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. I was also hoping to find that they all ban together like sorority sisters for support, playdates, outings, anything to keep from eating dinner alone most nights of the week. I had high hopes. Maybe a little too high.

Although very sympathetic and willing to offer any advice, it seems that we are for the most part, on our own. There is a playgroup that meets twice a month and one or two other activities planned each month, but nothing consistent or routine. That would be difficult though, because each spouse has children of different ages and we all live in various parts of town.

It seems too, that these ladies (who are several years ahead of us) are growing very tired of the surgical lifestyle. They maybe caught up in the "if we can just make it to... stage. I've read about that stage and hoped it didn't really exist. That's the point when your children think Daddy lives at the hospital and you pretty much do to. You cling to ideas of just making it to the end of the rotation, or year, or residency, instead of cherishing and enjoying each day. I can see how enjoying each day could become more and more difficult as each year passes and responsibility at home and at the hospital increases. That's why I am bound and determined to find and maintain a strong support group.

One of the spouses travels a lot. Her daughter isn't two yet and she can get cheap flights home pretty often. That must help give her something to look forward to, a break from the mundane, and a great chance to keep in touch with everyone. Maybe one day...

For now, we'll continue to enjoy our new city by visiting new parks and the occasional meal out :)

Today our friend Valerie took AGW and I to http://www.bonbonerie.com/ for lunch. It was so cute and yummy! (I can't seem to get the hyperlink to work, so just copy and paste the link when you're ready to view some amazing pastries!) AGW fell in love with the little ladybug and bumblebee cookies and we will surprise Carey with a mini keylime pie, his favorite!



So, here is a quick update on Carey: So far he is surviving transplant surgery. The days are long, he is there by 5:30 a.m. and I can expect him home anytime between 8-9:30 p.m. He isn't getting to operate much because he is at the bottom of the totem pole (attending surgeon, fellow surgeon, chief, him, then medical student). He is lucky that he's tall enough to see over everyone and get a glimpse of what is going on! Also, this is a different hospital than the last rotation and they still rely on the tradition paper chart system. Nothing is done electronically, so all notes are hand-written. It's a slow and tedious process. Notes will be his specialty when he's done with this rotation! I think that he gets in on an occasional surgery when one of the upper level surgeons is gone. Other than that, he works all day to do the paperwork that no one else wants to do, but at least he's surviving.

Oh! Have I given an update on Baby Hayes yet? If I already did, just chalk this next part up to pregnancy brain. We finally visited a doctor here in 'Nati. He seems very friendly and outgoing and I like him already. AGW was slightly confused by him because he was wearing the same outfit her daddy wears. I think this helped her feel a little more at ease when he was around. He knew to ask her about her lovie (big points with that one!) and he also was very interested in what movie she was watching on her DVD player. These things gave him points in my book as well. Not much has changed, the pregnancy is going well and we are still hoping for a vbac (vaginal birth after Cesarean). I was slightly disappointed to learn that he doesn't usually induce labor after a c-section because the risk of uterine rupture quadruples (it's still pretty low though). If Hayes comes naturally around 37-38 weeks then we are good to go forward. If by 39 weeks we've had no changes, we will have another c-section. Either way, we won't know anything until just before the due date. My mom booked her flight to come help me on October 7th. This means he'll probably decide to come at the end of September :)

Weekend plans include lots of outdoor playtime, swimming, and hopefully putting together the crib. We'll see...